HOWLERS:SIDELIGHTS ON KIPLING

FROM MY FATHER'S COLLECTION: THE " HOWLERS OMNIBUS",1938

1.   There were comical conditions when Kipling started journalism in India.One who saw him at work has described Kipling in his office in white trousers,his open vest exposing an expanse of chest,and literally covered from neck to feet with splashes of ink,which also thickly sprinkled the floor for yards around him.
' He is the most dangerous man to approach",said his newspaper chief." I scarcely ever come near him without getting a dab of ink in my eye or on my clothes,so recklessly does he flourish his pen.But you see,you can forgive much to a genius!".
"Genius be blowed!" is stated to have been the ink-slinger's reply.

2.   One more about Kipling.They say this one he told against himself.He was staying in the hills at Simla. It is the custom for the wives of Anglo-Indians to stay in the hills during the summer,when the heat on the plains is almost unbearable.It is general to meet these"grass widows" almost at every turn.Kipling was introduced to a lady,and during the talk said:"I suppose you can't help thinking of your poor husband grilling down there?"
Kipling's companion gave him a stern stare.It turned out that  the lady was not a "grass widow",but a real one.